[well, it sure is the season to be jolly and all that, isn't it? not that dante specifically planned this to work out this way, but—whatever. the devil hunter has no doubt that constantin is in the moon temple, and it's just a matter of tracking the man down in the dormitories before he is found.]
[with little preamble, dante walks over to him and deposits this bottle of rum onto his hands.]
The best drinks are not from the taverns, but from the priestess herself.
[Constantin is indeed in the Temple, and he is very busy getting a good sulk in, because he might be just a tiny bit hungover, maybe. But he's not hard to find, so you're welcome, Dante.
The look he gives the bottle and then Dante is one that is waiting for the other shoe to drop; what is the catch. Is this actually just monster piss in a nice bottle? Is it, Dante?]
[dante prefers whiskey to rum, and he just wants it off his hands, really.]
I don't like people in general.
[insert crawling_in_my_skin.amv here, but the smile that dante offers barely reaches his eyes—like he's contending with the idea that he fixates a lot on what makes humans the worst but also the best of all.]
Doesn't mean I can't help a fellow alcoholic get his fix.
[ these days, Cinnabar tends to wander around the moon temple rather than head into town. Not inside the temple -- around it, outside of the building. Here, they've found, they have the lowest chance of running into too many of the others. The close quarters of being indoors still makes them nervous, despite the spacious interior of the structure, and the town is so crowded with people that being outside hardly helps.
So the outskirts of the temple it is. The snow's half-melted, in that brown, slushy stage, and it's impossible not to hear Cinnabar coming, much to their dismay. Which means that, as much as they'd rather avoid the contact, there's no way Constantin didn't notice them when they happen upon him by the temple walls. ]
... You're that guy from before. [ Cinnabar knows his name... they just choose not to use it. ] Why are you out here...?
[Constantin spends more time outside the Temple than not these days, now that he's a prized student of the Terebellum University(!!!) and gives himself plenty of errands to do in town, just to have an excuse to go out. It's usually boredom that sees him out and about, but today, he needs magic practice— the absolute most exciting two words ever put together in that order, for sure. The last thing he needs is to scorch his bedroom furniture with a misplaced fire spell, which is only partially nonsense, because he's not nearly skilled enough yet to really burn that much...
Still! He's outside, standing in the slush with his satchel of very important parchments from wizard school set aside nearby on a low wall that probably surrounds a tiny garden in the warmer months. Whatever he's doing is not immediately recognizable as anything, let alone magic, but he still pauses with his hands held up in a definitively odd way when Cinnabar comes around the corner. Hmmm--]
Oh— what a surprise! [Red buddy, speaking to him... amazing!! He gestures over at the satchel, as if that means literally anything.] I'm practicing my studies!
[ it means exactly nothing!! Cinnabar also instantly remembers how much of a handful Constantin is as soon as he opens his mouth, and feels a tinge of regret, but it's too late now. (Is it? There's nothing stopping them from just leaving. Truth be told, Cinnabar is lonely - not that they'll ever acknowledge it.) ]
Of what? The castle walls?
[ it's not like he could be studying the enemy faction out here... ]
[ Here you go, he's sent you some mail. It's a small package wrapped in brown paper and twine. Inside is a small jewelry box and a note in V's precise handwriting.]
Dear Constantin,
Enclosed is a piece of seashell jewelry. It can be used to summon the kelpie knight Marinell, if you find yourself in trouble. You just need to remove it from your ear with the intent to summon him.
I think it is also adequately enchanted to be used as an offering, per our discussion.
If you have a moment's time for me, I have a request.
⟪ no introduction – she reckons the compass takes care of such matters for her, and besides, she is used to her jade sea accent faring as a rather unique form of identification. ⟫
[ He's brought a housewarming present for the new cottage. V is standing in the rain outside the door with a jasmine plant and a box full of cookies from Hakuno. ]
[And Constantin, who has never been a homemaker before but has decided it's excellent by virtue of getting to decorate, comes to the door all chipper and cheer as usual, hastily stepping aside to usher V in.]
Hello! Do get out of the rain, come in, come in— I'm not quite done with it, so pardon the mess.
[The clutter. It's a smaller cottage than V and Hakuno's, and Constantin is weak to buying things that look neat without really thinking it through, so... it's going great.]
[Felix doesn't mind children? Oh, he's not, like, Mercie-level fond of them; he doesn't always know what to say to them, or what to do with them, but kids are... okay, he thinks. Funny, at times. So many of them say exactly what's on their mind, too young to care about being polite, and of course Felix appreciates that.
But riding out to visit an orphanage full of children is... well, it's many things, but what matters is this: Constantin asked him to come. Constantin asked him to come because the orphanage is, naturally, important to him—and that makes it important to Felix. Dramatic? Maybe, but it's true. Constantin takes pride in, and obviously cares for, the children he watches over, so...
...So. It's why Felix is here one lovely morning, reminding himself that he doesn't mind children, even gaggles of children, as he knocks on the door to the orphanage. Dorte is by the front gate, probably chewing on some flowers Ragnar takes great care of, but it's fine! Surely it's fine. Felix is too busy taking in the state of things to care what his silly war horse is up to at any given time. Let him Cronch.]
[Things are really Happening for Constantin these days, which really only means he's come into a small fortune by virtue of, uh, asking for it, and so he has renovations! and landscaping! and real estate! to manage. Manage being the operative word; he is an excellent manager, and more capable people are handling the rest. Ragnar in particular is handling the landscaping, which precious Dorte is having a snack on...
But it doesn't matter! (It does to Ragnar, Felix's sworn enemy as of ten minutes from now when he notices.) What matters to Constantin is that Felix has come all this way to see his orphanage and meet his kids and, well— it's nice? A few people have come out here already, to bring books and supplies for the children, but Constantin has very different filters for what is generous charity and what is someone important to him coming to see something important to him. And some tiny someones... and Ragnar, but he's already made peace with the fact that these two grumpy men will not get along.
All of which is to say Felix has to wait not long at all before the door swings open, and abruptly, because it's the wonder twins clamoring to see this mystery sword man. Does one of them look Felix up and down and immediately ask "How many swords did you bring?" Yes, of course. Constantin is, like, a yard behind, because jesus—]
That is precisely what I told you not to blurt out first thing, [Kids(tm)... anyway, while he shuffles these Children out of the way, hey,] —Come in!
[Briefing the Priestess goes... well, you know. It goes. Fortuna's warning—and the thought of Constantin, alone with the pain in the ass that is Archimedes—tempers Felix's tongue, but he's never been one to keep his opinions to himself; like, by the time he strides out of the audience chamber, there's no mistaking how he feels about the duke, or the duchy, or anything else that's asked of him. And maybe Constantin would have taken a more, mmm, delicate approach? Maybe Constantin would have recognized when to push a particular issue and when to let it go.
...But Archimedes is an undeniable fool, and Constantin nearly paid the price for his foolishness, and Felix had the entire trip to the Temple to think about that. And let it be known that he's still thinking about that as he teleports to Luxuriae and rides all the way back to the duke's manor, because it doesn't matter that it all worked out in the end; the image of Constantin being tackled by the assassin is all but branded into Felix's brain, and it's funny, really, how this is the thing that sticks. They were plucked from their worlds to fight in a war, after all. Every day is a risk.
And that's the problem with becoming attached, as Felix knows all too well—and Felix knows that he is attached to Constantin. Has been, for quite some time, because while Constantin is excitable and loud and fifty other things that Felix is not, they've more in common than Felix—anyone, really—would have guessed. Oh, there's more to it, of course. So much more. It's the way he easily brushes Felix's brusqueness aside; it's the way he fires back whenever Felix's sharp tongue gets the better of him; it's the way he smiles at Felix whenever they're alone, so obviously pleased to spend whatever time together they can.
Or: Constantin is the person that Felix trusts above all others in their faction, and while Felix has stubbornly refused to relax in this world that is not his, he is... comfortable, when they're together. Somewhere down the line, Felix's ideal evening went from sitting alone in his room, checking every weapon that he owns, to sitting with Constantin? Listening to the rise and fall of Constantin's voice as he waits for Constantin to begin humming a mindless tune, and ah, but even Felix isn't so obtuse as to miss the meaning of this.
Knowing what to do with such knowledge, however, is a tricky thing indeed. It's simply there in his mind, right alongside the aforementioned image of Constantin hitting the ballroom floor—and there it stays as he stables his horse. As Yulia meets him in the yard and gives him a brief rundown as to Archimedes' men, and Archimedes' movements, and everything else Felix entrusted to his mercenaries. As he makes his way to whatever room Constantin is occupying at this early-ish evening hour—the study, probably, because this is just their lot in life—and enters without bothering to knock.
As he locks eyes with Constantin after all of two days apart and feels something unclench within his chest. Goddess. It's stupid, which means, naturally, that he must he must follow it up with something even stupider.]
Ah. Still awake.
[Felix, dinner was only like... an hour ago. Anyway, forgive him as he reaches up to brush (most of) his bangs to their proper side—and forgive the fact that he's probably covered in a good deal of dust from the road, given how quickly he rode back here. At least he did, in fact, see a Temple healer about his nose... no more swollen anything...]
[Archimedes is, still, the worst ever. Just to have to put up with, and while Constantin can honestly say the two days spent in the duke's study alternating between educating and plain old criticizing are more or less productive, it doesn't stop the headache he gets from dealing with the man. If it weren't for the people of the duchy he'd have gone home and left Archimedes to clean up his own mess, but he's already here and he does feel an obligation to help...
Well, it's two very, very tiring and boring days, ultimately. He does his best to keep busy just to minimize the amount of time he has to stay here once Felix returns; the more he gets done now, the sooner they can go home. That's what he has to look forward to in between arguing with Archimedes for hours on end: the ride back home with Felix, going back to his kids, the blessed reward of a quiet moment to rest... preferably still with Felix. He'll work it out.
So he is indeed still awake- weird thing to point out, but hello, hi- and at work at something or other when Felix returns. Constantin holds up a finger and doesn't look up, very busily scribbling on this Important Work...]
And how. I can't say I don't understand why my tutor felt the way he did about me when I was a boy, now.
[Somewhere, Archimedes senses that he's being called a literal child and resents them both a little more. Whatever!! Constantin finishes his scribbling and looks up, brightening now that he can pause this for a moment for... Felix time. Aha.]
You look better. [dusty, but okay] How was the Temple?
I was not expecting to have another discussion before I wrote this. My intention had been to write something boring and benign, then judge the resultant reply. In a way, we've already accomplished that consideration and this letter is ornamental now, but I also wanted to be alone with my thoughts. So I put you off a few weeks more.
I've always been able to be myself before you, and in a way that is what is unfortunate. My 'self' has been messy and unformed for most of that time. There are parts of it which remain that way. I don't expect you to intuit my changes, not any more than I expect to intuit yours.
We are the same in enough regards though. Vergil is not my father, but I spend every moment in dread of becoming him. When I was part of him, I was what he beat and broke in order to achieve power. I was not allowed to grow or flourish, and neither were you. You want what has been denied to you, but you don't know how to hold on to it.
I don't want to be motivated by regret any longer, and I don't want to grasp at things so fearfully that I strangle them. I want to be motivated by what I think is right, and that is repairing Fellden so that I can return to where I came from. I need to give everything I have to the person I am, so that he can be a better man.
What I have left undone is burning a hole inside of me.
I cannot pretend to be happy. I cannot help shoulder the burden of optimism the way a friend should, and I don't want to try desperately to be that person for you. One hurts you, while the other hurts me. I thought I could make myself believe it, and that the ease would come with practice.
So it is my turn to apologize. If all of this was abrupt and unbidden to you, I am sorry. It took time and changes around me to realize things could not stay as they were. I think I had hoped you would say the same when I asked about Marinell's cuff. That my desperation to meet these ideals had gone too far. It doesn't matter that you didn't, it was mine to decide.
And I need to be different now. I do want to remain your friend, but I need to try it anew without the cloud of infatuation I've been living under.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
12/25 unfortunately,, don't misconstrue this
[with little preamble, dante walks over to him and deposits this bottle of rum onto his hands.]
The best drinks are not from the taverns, but from the priestess herself.
[he didn't even have to pay for it!]
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The look he gives the bottle and then Dante is one that is waiting for the other shoe to drop; what is the catch. Is this actually just monster piss in a nice bottle? Is it, Dante?]
...Thank you. [But also,] You don't even like me.
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I don't like people in general.
[insert crawling_in_my_skin.amv here, but the smile that dante offers barely reaches his eyes—like he's contending with the idea that he fixates a lot on what makes humans the worst but also the best of all.]
Doesn't mean I can't help a fellow alcoholic get his fix.
[the impression he has already...]
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ZOINK let's make it 1/3 why not... action
So the outskirts of the temple it is. The snow's half-melted, in that brown, slushy stage, and it's impossible not to hear Cinnabar coming, much to their dismay. Which means that, as much as they'd rather avoid the contact, there's no way Constantin didn't notice them when they happen upon him by the temple walls. ]
... You're that guy from before. [ Cinnabar knows his name... they just choose not to use it. ] Why are you out here...?
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Still! He's outside, standing in the slush with his satchel of very important parchments from wizard school set aside nearby on a low wall that probably surrounds a tiny garden in the warmer months. Whatever he's doing is not immediately recognizable as anything, let alone magic, but he still pauses with his hands held up in a definitively odd way when Cinnabar comes around the corner. Hmmm--]
Oh— what a surprise! [Red buddy, speaking to him... amazing!! He gestures over at the satchel, as if that means literally anything.] I'm practicing my studies!
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Of what? The castle walls?
[ it's not like he could be studying the enemy faction out here... ]
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un: v
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un: mitsuri
you didn't faint again and get kidnapped or anything did you??
[ please respond she is so WORRIED ]
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Yes
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I am well, thank you
I did not faint again
[He did, but never mind.]
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[ hurt more?? well, whatever ]
how is everything over in moon territory?
i would go over and visit but the emperor's not very happy with me right now
[ and also they would kick her out immediately but eh, details. ]
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[ Great descriptor V. ]
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Are you feeling better now?
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A PACKAGE
Dear Constantin,
Enclosed is a piece of seashell jewelry. It can be used to summon the kelpie knight Marinell, if you find yourself in trouble. You just need to remove it from your ear with the intent to summon him.
I think it is also adequately enchanted to be used as an offering, per our discussion.
I hope you never see any use for it.
-V
voice; un: melisandre
⟪ no introduction – she reckons the compass takes care of such matters for her, and besides, she is used to her jade sea accent faring as a rather unique form of identification. ⟫
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Ah— alright. I happen to have a moment to listen!
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action;
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Hello! Do get out of the rain, come in, come in— I'm not quite done with it, so pardon the mess.
[The clutter. It's a smaller cottage than V and Hakuno's, and Constantin is weak to buying things that look neat without really thinking it through, so... it's going great.]
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action; sometime in march? do not ask me impossible questions
But riding out to visit an orphanage full of children is... well, it's many things, but what matters is this: Constantin asked him to come. Constantin asked him to come because the orphanage is, naturally, important to him—and that makes it important to Felix. Dramatic? Maybe, but it's true. Constantin takes pride in, and obviously cares for, the children he watches over, so...
...So. It's why Felix is here one lovely morning, reminding himself that he doesn't mind children, even gaggles of children, as he knocks on the door to the orphanage. Dorte is by the front gate, probably chewing on some flowers Ragnar takes great care of, but it's fine! Surely it's fine. Felix is too busy taking in the state of things to care what his silly war horse is up to at any given time. Let him Cronch.]
what is march
But it doesn't matter! (It does to Ragnar, Felix's sworn enemy as of ten minutes from now when he notices.) What matters to Constantin is that Felix has come all this way to see his orphanage and meet his kids and, well— it's nice? A few people have come out here already, to bring books and supplies for the children, but Constantin has very different filters for what is generous charity and what is someone important to him coming to see something important to him. And some tiny someones... and Ragnar, but he's already made peace with the fact that these two grumpy men will not get along.
All of which is to say Felix has to wait not long at all before the door swings open, and abruptly, because it's the wonder twins clamoring to see this mystery sword man. Does one of them look Felix up and down and immediately ask "How many swords did you bring?" Yes, of course. Constantin is, like, a yard behind, because jesus—]
That is precisely what I told you not to blurt out first thing, [Kids(tm)... anyway, while he shuffles these Children out of the way, hey,] —Come in!
eldritch month
all of march is a single monday
you've never said a truer thing in your life
sad but true.....
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action; post-quest and post-banana bread coma for moi... it is Time
...But Archimedes is an undeniable fool, and Constantin nearly paid the price for his foolishness, and Felix had the entire trip to the Temple to think about that. And let it be known that he's still thinking about that as he teleports to Luxuriae and rides all the way back to the duke's manor, because it doesn't matter that it all worked out in the end; the image of Constantin being tackled by the assassin is all but branded into Felix's brain, and it's funny, really, how this is the thing that sticks. They were plucked from their worlds to fight in a war, after all. Every day is a risk.
And that's the problem with becoming attached, as Felix knows all too well—and Felix knows that he is attached to Constantin. Has been, for quite some time, because while Constantin is excitable and loud and fifty other things that Felix is not, they've more in common than Felix—anyone, really—would have guessed. Oh, there's more to it, of course. So much more. It's the way he easily brushes Felix's brusqueness aside; it's the way he fires back whenever Felix's sharp tongue gets the better of him; it's the way he smiles at Felix whenever they're alone, so obviously pleased to spend whatever time together they can.
Or: Constantin is the person that Felix trusts above all others in their faction, and while Felix has stubbornly refused to relax in this world that is not his, he is... comfortable, when they're together. Somewhere down the line, Felix's ideal evening went from sitting alone in his room, checking every weapon that he owns, to sitting with Constantin? Listening to the rise and fall of Constantin's voice as he waits for Constantin to begin humming a mindless tune, and ah, but even Felix isn't so obtuse as to miss the meaning of this.
Knowing what to do with such knowledge, however, is a tricky thing indeed. It's simply there in his mind, right alongside the aforementioned image of Constantin hitting the ballroom floor—and there it stays as he stables his horse. As Yulia meets him in the yard and gives him a brief rundown as to Archimedes' men, and Archimedes' movements, and everything else Felix entrusted to his mercenaries. As he makes his way to whatever room Constantin is occupying at this early-ish evening hour—the study, probably, because this is just their lot in life—and enters without bothering to knock.
As he locks eyes with Constantin after all of two days apart and feels something unclench within his chest. Goddess. It's stupid, which means, naturally, that he must he must follow it up with something even stupider.]
Ah. Still awake.
[Felix, dinner was only like... an hour ago. Anyway, forgive him as he reaches up to brush (most of) his bangs to their proper side—and forgive the fact that he's probably covered in a good deal of dust from the road, given how quickly he rode back here. At least he did, in fact, see a Temple healer about his nose... no more swollen anything...]
Find more ledgers to sort through?
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Well, it's two very, very tiring and boring days, ultimately. He does his best to keep busy just to minimize the amount of time he has to stay here once Felix returns; the more he gets done now, the sooner they can go home. That's what he has to look forward to in between arguing with Archimedes for hours on end: the ride back home with Felix, going back to his kids, the blessed reward of a quiet moment to rest... preferably still with Felix. He'll work it out.
So he is indeed still awake- weird thing to point out, but hello, hi- and at work at something or other when Felix returns. Constantin holds up a finger and doesn't look up, very busily scribbling on this Important Work...]
And how. I can't say I don't understand why my tutor felt the way he did about me when I was a boy, now.
[Somewhere, Archimedes senses that he's being called a literal child and resents them both a little more. Whatever!! Constantin finishes his scribbling and looks up, brightening now that he can pause this for a moment for... Felix time. Aha.]
You look better. [dusty, but okay] How was the Temple?
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dw let me post this
prayer circle for dw
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a fun message;
I was not expecting to have another discussion before I wrote this. My intention had been to write something boring and benign, then judge the resultant reply. In a way, we've already accomplished that consideration and this letter is ornamental now, but I also wanted to be alone with my thoughts. So I put you off a few weeks more.
I've always been able to be myself before you, and in a way that is what is unfortunate. My 'self' has been messy and unformed for most of that time. There are parts of it which remain that way. I don't expect you to intuit my changes, not any more than I expect to intuit yours.
We are the same in enough regards though. Vergil is not my father, but I spend every moment in dread of becoming him. When I was part of him, I was what he beat and broke in order to achieve power. I was not allowed to grow or flourish, and neither were you. You want what has been denied to you, but you don't know how to hold on to it.
I don't want to be motivated by regret any longer, and I don't want to grasp at things so fearfully that I strangle them. I want to be motivated by what I think is right, and that is repairing Fellden so that I can return to where I came from. I need to give everything I have to the person I am, so that he can be a better man.
What I have left undone is burning a hole inside of me.
I cannot pretend to be happy. I cannot help shoulder the burden of optimism the way a friend should, and I don't want to try desperately to be that person for you. One hurts you, while the other hurts me. I thought I could make myself believe it, and that the ease would come with practice.
So it is my turn to apologize. If all of this was abrupt and unbidden to you, I am sorry. It took time and changes around me to realize things could not stay as they were. I think I had hoped you would say the same when I asked about Marinell's cuff. That my desperation to meet these ideals had gone too far. It doesn't matter that you didn't, it was mine to decide.
And I need to be different now. I do want to remain your friend, but I need to try it anew without the cloud of infatuation I've been living under.
-V